When authenticity is the value you live by, you find yourself living in a way that frees you from a desire to manipulate other people’s reactions or behavior.
Engaging in tactful radical honesty in your personal relationships is one way to show your utmost respect toward the other. It allows the other person to make their own choices regarding whether or not to continue the relationship/friendship/connection in light of what is true for both parties.
Consciously and gracefully expressing one’s authentic feelings, needs and desires invites the other person to a dance or sets them free.
Many of us, consciously or unconsciously, tend to default to selective sharing/withholding, in an effort to control other people’s perceptions of us so as to achieve a particular (favorable) outcome. While discernment around what to share and withhold in particular contexts is a very important and useful life skill, when it comes to the matters of the heart in our intimate relationships or close friendships, avoiding vulnerability still leaves us vulnerable. But it leaves us vulnerable to being in relationships that are not based on what is truly at the heart of all people involved. And how can we ever know if other people truly love and accept us for who we really are, unless we share our true selves with them?
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